I'm late, I'm late... for a very important date!!

Time management where have you gone??  My husband, Eric, does not think it is very funny that I am really proud of myself when I am only 10 minutes late to be somewhere.  He prides himself on being early... which needless to say aggravates him to no end to go anywhere with me.  In the Coast Guard they have a saying.  "If you are on time you are late.  Five minutes early and you are on time."
I know I'm not the only one who is chronically late. (ahem, Laura Engelmann)  I don't know if I have always been like this because my life before kids is like a black hole.  My brain is so consumed with kids and all things kids that I really have a hard time remembering what life was like before them. 
In my opinion, if you know about something that you have to do the day before you should have enough time to plan ahead and be ready on time and out the door on time.  Does that ever actually happen for me? Nope.  Sometimes I even tell myself that I need to leave 30 minutes earlier than I need to just to balance out the "late factor".  How is it that I still end up late even with the extra 30 minute window?  I'll tell you how- crap happens.  Literally.  It never fails just as I am ready to walk out the door, there is a potty emergency- whether it be in the pants/diaper or in the potty.  Cooper usually waits till I put him in the car seat and then do the last sweep around the house turning off lights and when I get back to him 30 seconds later- poop.
That is my first excuse... the second is that I am no longer just getting myself ready.  I am responsible for making sure everyone is clean, fed, dressed, snacks/drink packed, extra clothes (just in case) and that is not even counting the 4 minutes that I have to throw my hair up in a "mom tail" and change out of my jamies and into some equally form flattering outfit.  My goal lately is to simply not have spit up/pee/poop on me when I leave the house. And lets not forget finding the keys to the car and then the battle of strapping the kids in to their seats.  Mason wants to help with everything and so everything takes 5 minutes longer than it used to.
My third excuse... I'm blogging now... I have to drop Mason off at his friends house at 2 and it is now 12:30 and I have spent the morning cleaning up the house and playing outside with Mason so I look a mess, Mason lost all of his clothes as some point so is now cruising in only undies- and Cooper is sick.  Why wouldn't this be the perfect time to blog about not being able to manage my time... yeah, I know.
The forth excuse (apparently I have a lot of excuses!!)  I do things that really don't matter when I should be doing anything else.  Have to leave in 20 minutes, perfect time to clean out the junk drawer! Then I wonder why I didn't make it!  I heard a funny story this morning about a girl (I won't mention my sisters name for her privacy) Who was running a little late for work (It might run in the family) and thought it was the perfect time to hem her pants... tadaaa- late.  In her defense, she only works one day a week, and not every week.  This puts her in a category all on her own.  I can deal with shlepping around in a tee shirt and jeans where she has to look like a respectable professional... that requires finding more than 4 minutes to get ready... and apparently time to hem pants?? ha ha  And then there is the "this is not my normal routine" factor.  Full time working mom's have their morning schedule and have every day to perfect it. The one day thrown in here or there is what I like to call the "wild card" of time management... anyone who can be on time on one of those "wild card" days... I commend you... and could use some advice on how that actually happens!
Lastly, I think I am an adrenaline junkie.  I think I put things off till the last minute just so that I can rush around and stress and then when I finally get out of the house- I think "Yeah, I did it!" and only 10 minutes late- Whoop whoop!" Don't judge me.  It's a sickness... and as soon as I finish this post and  organize my closet I'm totally going to start working harder on being on time.